I’ve been a life-long Charmin user. Even when “fancier” varients came to market, I stuck with my tried-and-true Charmin Regular (with the red label). Then a few months ago, Procter & Gamble decided to confuse everyone by discontinuing Charmin Regular, and replacing it with Charmin Ultra Strong (in indentical packaging), along with Charmin Ultra Soft (with a blue label). I didn’t even notice the change in wording, and picked up the one in the red packaging.

We IMMEDIATELY noticed the difference. This shit (no pun intended) was ROUGH! Wipe too many times, and your ass starts bleeding!? This was going to be a rough time, as we had bought the mega 24-roll pack. Thankfully, we finally finished up with them, and decided to try the Ultra Soft product instead. Can we say dingleberry central? Ugh. It’s definitely soft, but it’s too messy for my tastes.

Contacting Charmin confirmed my worst fears - Charmin Regular had been discontinued. But never fear, they’ve got something called Charmin Basic, which is supposed to be very similar to the discontinued Charmin Regular.. It’s got some bizzare looking packaging, but I’m willing to overlook that if it meets my needs. Unfortunately, I’ve been unable to find this varient ANYWHERE. I don’t know if stores aren’t carrying it because of it’s ugly packagine or what, but I’m pretty bummed..

Is your ass as sore as mine? Sound off and give Charmin a piece of your mind. Call them toll-free at 800-777-1410, M-F 9:00 a.m. to 6:00 p.m. EST.

BRING BACK CHARMIN REGULAR!